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some trance jokes to change the ambient in here
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mica
Inactive User
Started Topics :
30
Posts :
395
Posted : Mar 18, 2011 22:48:55
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-Im so Trance
-Even my pubes are dreadlocked
-My clothes are so fluro, I moon light at an Airport to help guide planes down safely
-My farts smell like Nag Champa incense
-the hairs on my arms have stopped growing because I have so many arm bands from parties
-I have every single trance album since 1995, copied, ofcourse..
-Simon Posford calls me up for track name idea's
-I use Liquid Acid for eyedrops
-I can use just my hand as a hash chillum
-My heart beats at 145 BPM
-My urine has been classed by the goverment as a controlled hallucinogenic substance
-I have shrunk from 6ft to 5ft because of all the dancing
-My ringtone is an unreleased Shpongle track recorded off a DAT tape from 1996
-i'm a nudist, vegan buddhist with no material possessions... except my Pentium 4 3.2Ghz PC with 6GB of RAM, Edirol FA-101 Firewire Audio Capture Interface and Roland DM–20 Digital Stereo Monitors for writing killaaarggh trance tracks
-I dont eat anything that casts a shadow, infact anything that has ever lived, I survive mainly on rocks and sand
-can setup my tent in 10sec flat.. unsetup in 5sec.
-don't use public transport - I astral travel
-I sweat LSD...
-I can spin fire Poi using only my tongue
-I can make a trance track using only a fork, hair curler and a jiffy bag
-Parties are cancelled when I say I wont attend
-I have a 2 chai tea stalls, 1 falafel and humous stall and 2 Chillum and bong stalls at everyparty...and I run them all by my self at the same time while dancing on the dance floor.
-My name is actually 'Trance' but you can call me Mr Trance, my friends call me Psy
-I know every major trance producer around the world...... they will deny this tho, but only because I asked them to keep it a secret.
-I have registered my house as an official after party club for Trance parties
-I see in Ultraviolet light only
-I can name any track from hearing only one beat of the kick drum
-when i hear workmen using a mechanical metal saw I say, hmm, nice acid synth lead line.
-they use me as a backdrop at parties cos Im so covered in psychedelic tattoos and uv clothes
-my legs have built in saddle bags
- Whenever I have a headache i hug a chrystal
- everytime i'm in a bad mood i blame the stars
-I label all people who bath occasionally; image conscious posers
-Everytime i say something i try to sound deep
-when people look at me i think they're undercover cops
-i think tie dye's still cool
-i hug trees for a living
-i can beatmatch a bus drone and a pneumatic jack-hammer in sync
- if i stop listenig to trance for 1 hour i start to shake with withdrawl symptoms
-even my underwear is made from hemp
- I talk to my plants and they reply
-Every year like clockwork, I moan about how "the scene just isn't the same anymore.." even though I still keep going to every party. |
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Colin OOOD
OOOD/Voice of Cod
Started Topics :
95
Posts :
5380
Posted : Mar 18, 2011 23:35
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a3k
IsraTrance Team
Started Topics :
269
Posts :
7826
Posted : Mar 19, 2011 00:05
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who´s the bakers favourite dj?
arthur baker..
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Pavel
Troll
Started Topics :
313
Posts :
8649
Posted : Mar 19, 2011 12:39
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* How many psy trance fans does it take to change a light bulb?
10, 1 to actually change it and 9 to bitch how the old one was better.
* How many psy trance fans does it take to change a light bulb?
10, 1 to actually change it and 9 to bitch how better would it be to live without electricity.
Everyone in the world is doing something without me |
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Wizack Twizack
Wizack Twizack
Started Topics :
239
Posts :
3486
Posted : Mar 19, 2011 21:20
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TranceVisuals
TranceVisuals
Started Topics :
23
Posts :
743
Posted : Mar 19, 2011 21:31
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* How many psy trance fans does it take to change a light bulb?
None, the lightbulb was a collective hallucination.
* How many psy trance fans does it take to change a light bulb?
None, the psytrancers realised their own inner light, and shone for the world to see.
www.youtube.com/trancevisuals
2,000,000+ views and counting. |
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filter
Moderator
Started Topics :
87
Posts :
703
Posted : Mar 20, 2011 00:56
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minus
IsraTrance Full Member
Started Topics :
103
Posts :
1614
Posted : Mar 20, 2011 05:56
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hehehe |
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Aluxe
IsraTrance Junior Member
Started Topics :
25
Posts :
725
Posted : Mar 20, 2011 06:56
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Dennis the menace
DevilsDennis Sparris McHilton
Started Topics :
128
Posts :
2899
Posted : Mar 20, 2011 09:17
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Got some more dj jokes 
how many psytrance dj's does it take to change a lightbulb?
10.
1 to do it and 9 to say how they would have done it differently.
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You DJ so bad, you battle the machine at 7-11 that mixes slurpees. =)
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You DJ so bad, you got training wheels on your setup.
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You DJ so bad, when the promoter said there was a Rane in the DJ booth, you brought an umbrella to the party.
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You DJ so bad, that the news showed up because they heard it was a train wreck there that killed everything.
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You Dj so bad that only deaf girls want to go home with you.
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You DJ so bad, your 'beatmatching' sounds like an epileptic drummer convention.
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You DJ so bad, you feel threatened by computers
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Outolintu
IsraTrance Full Member
Started Topics :
63
Posts :
1477
Posted : Mar 20, 2011 09:23
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nice initiative! 
"no one ever sweats on a plug-in" -moby |
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Beat Agency
IsraTrance Full Member
Started Topics :
53
Posts :
1752
Posted : Mar 20, 2011 15:15
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Baba Gil DJ so bad, that the news showed up because they heard it was a train wreck there that killed everything.
www.beatagency.dk |
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A.Rosengren
Solid Snake
Started Topics :
266
Posts :
4139
Posted : Mar 20, 2011 15:28
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TIP had to change name to RIP
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Outolintu
IsraTrance Full Member
Started Topics :
63
Posts :
1477
Posted : Mar 20, 2011 23:06
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Q: How many DJs does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: 23. Two to hold the ladder, one to climb the ladder and screw it in, and the rest sitting there with their arms folded and thinking they could do it better.
Q: How do you tell if a DJ is actually dead?
A: Hold out a check (but don’t be fooled: a slight, residual spasmodic clutching action may occur even hours after death has occurred).
Q: What do you call a DJ without a girlfriend?
A: Homeless
Q: What’s the difference between the owner of a night club and the PLO?
A: You can negotiate with the PLO
Q: What’s the difference between a DJ and a puppy?
A: The puppy will stop whining after a couple of months.
"no one ever sweats on a plug-in" -moby |
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Benji27
Inactive User
Started Topics :
0
Posts :
33
Posted : Mar 21, 2011 01:31
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Quote:
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On 2011-03-18 23:35, Colin OOOD wrote:
Two DJs are talking... one says to the other "hey, do you want to go to the cinema tonight?"; the other replies "dunno, who's the projectionist?"
Joke (c) Ott 
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2 Projectionists were talking
Dave slapped Steve
Johdy slapped Dave
Steve slapped Dave
Dave slapped Robin
Everyone slapped Dave
Kristian became Daves BF
Dave and Kristian SLAP the world
poor cock Robin and Shane Gobi
hahaha ciao |
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