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Trance Forum » » Forum  The Workshop - Outside the Universe 142 BPM
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Outside the Universe 142 BPM

TimeTraveller
IsraTrance Full Member

Started Topics :  80
Posts :  3207
Posted : Dec 28, 2017 21:59:49
Hi, I created a tune again and would love
to read some comments, ciritics & opinions etc. What do you think about it? What can I improve?

https://soundcloud.com/shivagarden/outside-the-universe


          https://soundcloud.com/shivagarden
knocz
Moderator

Started Topics :  40
Posts :  1151
Posted : Dec 29, 2017 15:27
Hey,

Nice stuff! Mix wise this sounds good, the sonic spectrum is well filled; you have a lot of concepts set down and a nice story telling as well.

As an immediate critic - I've seen you say you've designed each synth patch yourself, but some synth patches do sound a tad bit dull. The second (high resonance-like) pad in the intro is nice but not that elaborate; but I think you'll easily progress as you make more and more patches. Just don't be shy of (searching for the appropriate word) being "influenced" by presets - you could consider them as a different init patch for what you come up with.

The drums do sound a bit loud though in the mix, the initial snare just smacks you hard in the face. Maybe a bit of reverb on the drum bus and lower the channel a little bit to make it blend in more

Around 2:34 you bring in a bassline in a lower key - and the energy seems lost for a bit -> but then you bring back the fundamental tone. You could sample this odd-baseline and process is slightly different to adjust to the key frequencies power differences
But at 2:43 when the beat does come in, somehow each second kick is "muffled".. maybe you have something playing at the same time, messing up the kick phase? - at 3:12 it seems to go away (when the snare goes out), so I would assume it's the snare hitting at the same time - a slight 2-3 ms nudge back on the entire snare track time works wonders to fix this (while keeping the drum transients intact)

3:21 - personally I think the bass should be playing until 3:35, the low end energy seems a bit lost during these 14 seconds, and the drums alone don't fill the required power to keep me moving.

4:05 - Missing the drums to help build up the tension If I were playing this tune live as a real drummer, I would start to feel that energy from the synths and would just want to build it up as well.. and not stand still

4:40 - one kick hit lost its power again.. but no snare this time. Maybe HP elements that don't need the low end, or use a simple (but extremely effective in EDM) trick to send everything not-beat-related to a bus, and side-chain it to the kick ever so slightly (a 3dB reduction would be a little too much IMO) just so, not matter what, there's always a little bit of space for the kick to shine out (and it would be the element most in front of your mix, if you desire such a thing).
Oh, and sampling you custom-designed-kick with all effects to a single kick sample file, manipulating the exact timings and repeating this kick in an audio track is - to me - the most effective way of maintaining the exact same kick sound and power across the tune. Same for the bass.

5:21 - different bassline, power changes dramatically, and the kick does seem to fluctuate again

At the end of the track the beat loses volume and it seems a bit inconsistent with the rest of the tune. Love the piano, but I think the beat must go on - kill the low end of the piano while the beat is playing, then at 6:15 the beat goes away and you can bring back the piano's low end.

I (again personally, no rights or wrong here) think that pad with the high resonance is unnecessary at the end, and the piano should fade to the other pad sound (the low-end noise wind-sounding one).


But I'm going into details here - overall it's a nice tune. Some more tinkering with the synth parameters; isolating the beat kick and bass to audio and making sure it's clear, consistent and balanced; some touches here and there - and it's a great track.

Good job man, keep it up! Please show up more           Super Banana Sauce http://www.soundcloud.com/knocz
the five assed monkey
IsraTrance Junior Member

Started Topics :  22
Posts :  145
Posted : Dec 30, 2017 02:01
Nice track but I think it needs a lot more work.

The arrangement is a bit of mess. to me it dont feel the parts are related to each other if that make sense..

The kick and bass are not stable I think knoz cover that.
I think you can have a better snare as well.
Some sounds are thin. maybe try to saturate or multi-band compress some sounds for a bit fatness. also, some space is missing to my ears like reverb, delays..

I really love the piano melody at 5:00. maybe use it again in the track like in the intro maybe..?

Nice Ideas you have it has good potential! keep it up
TimeTraveller
IsraTrance Full Member

Started Topics :  80
Posts :  3207
Posted : Dec 30, 2017 16:31
Knocz I'm very glad to read all this analysis and advice! Thank you guys !           https://soundcloud.com/shivagarden
TimeTraveller
IsraTrance Full Member

Started Topics :  80
Posts :  3207
Posted : Dec 31, 2017 15:17
Unfortunately, I somehow lost all midi data from this track. All files are in audio only. Usually, I bounce all midi data to audio as well as keep all instruments frozen in a dedicated muted folder, but this time I must have deleted. What a mistake

To correct things I now only can use the scissors, plug-ins or reproduce some passages. The thing is I really like my pads in this tune but haven't saved up the patch to fine tune things. Not sure which part you mean with the resonant pads? The middle ones in the break? With these I'm also not convinced. The main pads I actually like a lot.
I think I still can improve by your advice a lot in this tune eventhough I lost the midi and partly the patches. I will change snare and will have a look on phase issues and clarity, fattening of things, maybe take the last piano part and integrate it more into the tune etc I'll change a lot. Also definitely I take also advice that bass should play until 3:35 etc. Thanks again it's very helpful for me.           https://soundcloud.com/shivagarden
Bipolar
IsraTrance Full Member

Started Topics :  78
Posts :  490
Posted : Aug 28, 2018 10:03
Minute 1.59 those sounds like chopped vocals are really cool and psychedelic, 2.45 nice change I like that melody. 3.41 really cool sound like a guitar. The melody in min 5 really nice, thats an interesting scale is really mystical, Phrygian mode? Cool track!!

What I think it could improve your sound, is the eq of the kick, now a days pros eq kicks by taking almost all the mids, that makes the sound fatter and deep, I like to use Bazzism, and there is an envelope in the options of the vst, I usually make a big cut in the mids there, and the kicks are starting to sound more like psytrance kicks now a days, I think that could really give you more power in your sound, because the kick and bass is what its done normally at the beginning so your entire song get eq based on the kick and bass, I think is really important to have a solid kick and that was the tip I was given to achieve that. But overall is a really nice track, I liked it! peace!
TimeTraveller
IsraTrance Full Member

Started Topics :  80
Posts :  3207
Posted : Sep 20, 2018 00:18
thanks for feedback!           https://soundcloud.com/shivagarden
Trance Forum » » Forum  The Workshop - Outside the Universe 142 BPM
 
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