Author
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Does Your Monkey Like Psytrance?
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----Dawn----
IsraTrance Junior Member
Started Topics :
19
Posts :
789
Posted : Mar 9, 2006 20:09
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Sorry if you were expecting a joke but i am seeking your help with a serious scientific experiment.
• • •
A BRIEF BACKGROUND
In the mid 1970s, several studies were conducted on primates to discover their reactions to different types of music. These experiments produced some groundbreaking results. It revealed that different kinds of musical styles had startlingly different effects on the monkey's systemic neurology.
For example, monkeys subjected to loud rock music would typically jump around and urinate, light jazz made the monkeys weary and cynical while disco music turned many of the monkeys bald.
Sadly, these tests where halted in 1979 after an unfortunate incident in which 3 monkeys exploded.
• • •
THE PROPOSAL
I understand that testing on animals is a sensitive subject these days but personally I don't think that a few exploding monkeys should hamper important scientific discovery and i'm asking for your help and support in restarting tests on this subject. So, the question that i'm asking is:
Does anyone on this forum own a monkey, chimp or other primate with disposable thumbs?
If the answer is 'yes' then would you be willing to take part in an important experiment?
• • •
THE EXPERIMENT
1.1 The Hypothesis: The application of 'psytrance' will have an observable effect on the subject.
1.2 The Null Hypothesis: The application of 'psytrance' will have no observable effect on the subject.
1.3 The Evil Hypothesis: The subject will die in a messy and horrible way.
In the interest of ethics, we first need to lay down some basic ground rules. The experiment should be stopped immediately if your subject shows any of the following symptoms:
• Discomfort
• Disturbing behaviour
• Excessive flatulence
• Class 'C' Junky-Monkey syndrome
• Flaccid greenness or floppiness
• Unusual swelling
• Unpleasant sarcasm
• Preliminary exploding
• • •
PROCEDURE
The experiment will consist of 3 steps:
STEP 1: General Application
Start by playing your monkey several different styles of 'psytrance' and observe it's behaviour. Which genre does your monkey appear to like the most. Does it seem to be a moody dark-monkey or a happy morning-monkey. Note down your results.
STEP 2: Specific Application
Play your monkey a mix of both old and new 'psytrance'. Again, observe it's behaviour. If your monkey is trained in sign language, ask if it prefers the new sound or considers it to be too commercial. Note down your results.
STEP 3: Neutral Control
To end the experiment, play your monkey some minimal-progressive or minimal-ambient. Observe it's behaviour. Does it show any signs of restlessness or bored-shitlessness. Note down your results.
• • •
PARTICIPATION
Thank you in advance for your participation and know that your assistance in this study will help in the furtherance of modern monkey-related neurological science and Harlowesque sadistic monkey-evil.
  Am i the only one who believes in solipsism? |
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Dennis the menace
DevilsDennis Sparris McHilton
Started Topics :
128
Posts :
2899
Posted : Mar 9, 2006 20:23
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Where can i rent a monkey?
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Dennis the menace
DevilsDennis Sparris McHilton
Started Topics :
128
Posts :
2899
Posted : Mar 9, 2006 20:24
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Fragletrollet
Fragletrollet
Started Topics :
111
Posts :
1748
Posted : Mar 9, 2006 20:24
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You have way too little to do, |
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----Dawn----
IsraTrance Junior Member
Started Topics :
19
Posts :
789
Posted : Mar 9, 2006 20:31
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Quote:
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On 2006-03-09 20:24, Fragletrollet wrote:
You have way too little to do,
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How dare you mock my work, sir!!!
Look... i have a gun... and i'm not afraid to use it!
Just answer the question and no one gets hurt!
Well... ?
DOES YOUR DAMN MONKEY LIKE PSYTRANCE???
  Am i the only one who believes in solipsism? |
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Dogon
IsraTrance Junior Member
Started Topics :
50
Posts :
8779
Posted : Mar 9, 2006 20:44
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NO.....
PSYTRANCE doesnt likes my MONKEY SO i have let the MONKEY off n living with PSYTRANCE
  We were born naked & grow up to become wicked. |
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odysseus
IsraTrance Full Member
Started Topics :
99
Posts :
1387
Posted : Mar 9, 2006 20:45
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hahahahaha
  give me darma, take your karma.. |
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Pt.
IsraTrance Senior Member
Started Topics :
236
Posts :
6106
Posted : Mar 9, 2006 21:19
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Quote:
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On 2006-03-09 20:23, Dennis the menace wrote:
Where can i rent a monkey?
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On topic. My monkey isn't to fond of psy-trance. My monkey is more into pop music alla Britney and "Greace" soundtrack. My bird on the other hand is a BIG fan. Aphex Twin also pleases his ego.
"My Monkey"
I had a little monkey,
I sent him to the country,
and I fed him on gingerbread.
Along came a choo choo, knocked my monkey coo-coo!
And now my monkey's dead ..
At least he looks that way, but then again don't we all?
I had a little monkey,
I sent him to the country,
and I fed him on gingerbread.
Along came a choo choo, knocked my monkey coo-coo!
And now my monkey's dead ..
Poor little monkey.
We are out own wicked gods!
With little "g's" and big dicks!
Sadistic and constantly inflicting a slow demise.
I sent him to the country,
and I fed him on gingerbread.
Along came a choo choo, knocked my monkey coo-coo!
And now my monkey's dead ..
The primate's scream of consonance is a reflection.
Of his own mind's dissonance!
..
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l337
IsraTrance Full Member
Started Topics :
55
Posts :
817
Posted : Mar 9, 2006 21:35
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Dawn it is all very intersting to what you propose and stuff.....BUT why a monkey, whay not start with mice like any real scientific experiment?
BUT......
The problem is your work would not be original nor groundbreaking.....its BEEN DONE ALREADY! ITS HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!
pop down to your local psy trance party and watch many willing monkies unwillingly get exposed to hours and hours and psychedelic trance.
Last time i went to watch i noted two things reeally:
1. monkeys at psy parties are very funny to watch.
2.they become even funnier in their antics when they are fucked on substances.
PLease refer to the isratrance party gallery link page for documenting of this research.
cheers
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----Dawn----
IsraTrance Junior Member
Started Topics :
19
Posts :
789
Posted : Mar 9, 2006 21:36
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Quote:
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On 2006-03-09 21:19, psytones wrote:
My monkey isn't to fond of psy-trance. My monkey is more into pop music alla Britney and "Greace" soundtrack. My bird on the other hand is a BIG fan. Aphex Twin also pleases his ego.
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Ah, looks like you have a pop-monkey. Sorry, but that's no use.
Btw, my bird likes Westlife and James Blunt... but luckly i have a big box of earplugs!
  Am i the only one who believes in solipsism? |
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l337
IsraTrance Full Member
Started Topics :
55
Posts :
817
Posted : Mar 9, 2006 21:37
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Quote:
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On 2006-03-09 21:19, psytones wrote:
Quote:
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On 2006-03-09 20:23, Dennis the menace wrote:
Where can i rent a monkey?
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|
On topic. My monkey isn't to fond of psy-trance. My monkey is more into pop music alla Britney and "Greace" soundtrack. My bird on the other hand is a BIG fan. Aphex Twin also pleases his ego.
"My Monkey"
I had a little monkey,
I sent him to the country,
and I fed him on gingerbread.
Along came a choo choo, knocked my monkey coo-coo!
And now my monkey's dead ..
At least he looks that way, but then again don't we all?
I had a little monkey,
I sent him to the country,
and I fed him on gingerbread.
Along came a choo choo, knocked my monkey coo-coo!
And now my monkey's dead ..
Poor little monkey.
We are out own wicked gods!
With little "g's" and big dicks!
Sadistic and constantly inflicting a slow demise.
I sent him to the country,
and I fed him on gingerbread.
Along came a choo choo, knocked my monkey coo-coo!
And now my monkey's dead ..
The primate's scream of consonance is a reflection.
Of his own mind's dissonance!
..
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----Dawn----
IsraTrance Junior Member
Started Topics :
19
Posts :
789
Posted : Mar 9, 2006 21:45
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@l337
Yes, you are absolutely right!
Looks like i've wasted the last 20 years of my life. Fuck the monkeys... i'm off down the pub!
  Am i the only one who believes in solipsism? |
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Acidhive
IsraTrance Full Member
Started Topics :
76
Posts :
2014
Posted : Mar 9, 2006 21:52
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You're all a bunch of monkeyspankers.
  "Subconscious unravels at the point of death, and all time it has known erupts into a moment. As death extinguishes us, so we become it."
[Esoteric: Subconscious Dissolution Into The Continuum] |
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rich
IsraTrance Full Member
Started Topics :
103
Posts :
2184
Posted : Mar 9, 2006 22:11
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Quote:
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On 2006-03-09 20:09, ----Dawn---- wrote:
Does anyone on this forum own a monkey, chimp or other primate with disposable thumbs?
If the answer is 'yes' then would you be willing to take part in an important experiment?
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Opposable thumbs, yes. Disposable thumbs? no. He needs both of them.
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Yellow Warrior
IsraTrance Junior Member
Started Topics :
35
Posts :
898
Posted : Mar 10, 2006 15:20
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Quote:
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On 2006-03-09 21:52, Acidhive wrote:
You're all a bunch of monkeyspankers.
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whats that Monkey!!
  Rather than feeling that you're about to have the rug pulled from under you, let me teach you how to dance on a flying carpet |
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