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Alcohoroscopes! - so trueee
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juice
IsraTrance Full Member
Started Topics :
59
Posts :
2081
Posted : May 31, 2007 10:04
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ARIES : Drinking style Impulsive Aries people like to party and sometime
sdon't know when to call it a night. Their competitive streak makes them
prone to closing-time shot contests. They're sloppy, fun drunks, and they
get mighty flirty after a couple tipples. Getting Aries people drunk I sa
good way to get what you want out of them, should other methods fail. Aries
can become bellicose when blotto, but they will assume that whatever
happened should be forgiven (if not forgotten) by sunrise. They can be
counted on to do the same for you -- so long as you haven't gone and done
anything really horrible to them last night, you sneaky Gemini.
TAURUS Drinking style Taurus prefers to drink at a leisurely pace, aiming
for a mellow glow rather than a full-on zonk. Since a truly intoxicated
Taurus is a one-person stampede, the kind of bull-in-a-china-shop inebriate
who spills red wine on white carpets and tells fart jokes to employers, the
preference for wining and dining (or Bud and buddies) to body shots and
barfing is quite fortunate for the rest of us. This is not to say thatthe
Bull is by any means a teetotaler -- god, no. A squiffy Taurus will get, er,
gregarious (full of loud mouth soup, some would say) and is extremely
amusing to drag to a karaoke bar when intoxicated.
GEMINI Drinking style Gemini's can drink without changing their behavior
much-- they're so naturally chatty and short-attention-spanned that it's
just hard to tell sometimes. They can amaze you by conversing with finesse
and allusion, then doing something to belie an extremely advanced state of
intoxication, like puking in your shoe. Gemini's possess the magic ability
to flirt successfully (and uninfuriatingly, which is very tricky) with
several people at once. They like to order different cocktails every round
-- repetition is boring -- and may create a theme (like yellow drinks: beer,
sauvignon blanc and limoncello) for their own amusement.
CANCER Drinking style Cancer is a comfort drinker -- and an extra wine with
dinner or an after-work beer or six can be extra comforting, can't it,
Cancer darling? Like fellow water signs Scorpio and Pisces, Crabs must guard
against lushery. Cancers are brilliant at ferreting out secret parties and
insinuating themselves on VIP lists -- and, in true Hollywood style, Cancers
are never really drunk; instead, they get "tired and emotional" (read:
weepy
when lubricated). But there's nothing better than swapping stories (and
spit) over a few bottles of inky red wine with your favorite Cancer. Even
your second-favorite Cancer will do. The sign also rules the flavor vanilla,
and you'd be adored if you served up a vanilla vodka and soda.
LEO Drinking style Leo likes to drink and dance -- they're often fabulous
dancers, and usually pretty good drinkers as well, losing their commanding
dignity and turning kittenish. Of course, they're quite aware they're
darling -Leos will be Leos, after all. They generally know their limit,
probably because they loathe losing self-control. When they get
over-refreshed, expect flirting to ensue -- and perhaps not with the one
what rung them. But Leo's not the type to break rules even when drunk, so
just try to ignore it (try harder, Cancer) and expects a sheepish (and hung
over) Lion to make it up to you the next day.
VIRGO Drinking style Cerebral Virgos are compelled to impose order onto
their bender. Their famously fussy quest for purity could lead to drinking
less than other signs, sure --but it could also lead to drinking booze neat,
to sucking down organic wine or just to brand loyalty. They rarely get fully
shellacked -- but, oh, when they do! Virgo's controlled by the intellect,
but there's an unbridled beast lurking within, and they let it loose when
walloped. It's dead sexy (and surprisingly unsloppy). As one Virgo friend
used to declare, "I'm going to drink myself into a low-level of
intelligence
tonight." A toast to the sub genius IQ!
LIBRA Drinking style "I'm jusht a social drinker," slurs Libra,
"it's jusht
that I'm so damn social?" Libra loves nothing more than to party, mingle
and
relate to everyone. Whether dipped in favor of Good Libra (with
Insta-Frienddevice set to "on") or heavier on the Evil Libra side
(they are
little instigators when bored), the Scales can really work a room. Charming
as they are, Libras are notoriously lacking in self-control, however, which
can get them into all sorts of trouble --including wearing their wobbly
boots waaaay too early in the evening, flirting with every man/woman in the
roomor even blacking out the night's events entirely. Oops!
SCORPIO Drinking style Don't ever tell Scorpios they've had enough, for
they'll smirk at you and quietly but intentionally keep tippling till
they're hog-whimpering drunk, out of 100-proof spite. Scorpios like to
drink, and screw you if you have a problem with that. Most of them seethe
sauce as something to savor in itself, and not asa personality-altering tool
-- though if depressed, self-loathing Scorps seek total obliteration. But
generally, they're fascinating drinking pals, brilliant conversationalists
and dizzying flirts. They also remember everything -- especially what you
did when you were blitzed. Only drink with a Scorpio who likes you.
SAGITTARIUS Drinking style In vino veritas -- and, for Sagittarius, in booze
blurtiness: When buttered, they'll spill all your secrets and many of their
own. Tactlessness aside, Sagittarius is just plain fun to drink with. This
is a sign of serious partying (what else would you expect from the sign of
Sinatra, Keith Richards, the Bush twins and Anna Nicole Smith?). They're the
people who chat up everyone in the room, then persuade the entire crowd to
travel somewhere else -- like a nightclub, or a playground, or Cancun .
Good-natured hijinks are sure to ensue (including a high possibility of
loopy groping; spontaneous Sag is a brilliant booty call).
CAPRICORN Drinking style Capricorn is usually described as practical,
steadfast, money-hungry and status-thirsty -- no wonder they get left off
the astrological cocktail-party list. But this is the sign of David Bowie
and Annie Lennox, not to mention Elvis. Capricorn is the true rock star:
independent, powerful and seriously charismatic, not too eager to please.
And if they make money being themselves, who're you to quibble? But just
like most rock stars, they're either totally on or totally off, and they
generally need a little social lubricant to loosen up and enjoy the after
party, especially if they can hookup with a cute groupie.
AQUARIUS Drinking style Aquarius and drinking don't go together that
well(except for water, that is). They have an innate tendency toward
know-it-allism, and if they get an idea while sizzled, they're more stubborn
than a stain or a stone. If they're throwing a party or organizing an
outing, however, they're too preoccupied with their duties to get combative
-- and they make perfectly charming drunks in that case. Fortunately,
they're usually capital drink-nursers. They also make the best designated
drivers (if you can get them before they start raising their wrist):Aquarius
is fascinated by drunk people and capable of holding interesting
conversations with soused strangers while sober.
PISCES Drinking style If you're a Pisces, you've probably already heard that
you share a sign and an addictive personality --with Liz Taylor, Lisa
Minnelli and Kurt Cobain. Not only do Pisces like to lose themselves in the
dreamy, out-there feeling that only hooch can give, but they build up a
mighty tolerance fast. Who needs an expensive date like that? On the other
hand, they're fabulously enchanting partners, whether in conversation or in
crime. With the right Pisces, you can start out sharing a pitcher of
margaritas and windup in bed together for days. The phrase "addictive
personality" can be read two ways, you know
  Studies indicate that listening to music is good for digestion. |
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Janue
IsraTrance Junior Member
Started Topics :
19
Posts :
514
Posted : May 31, 2007 22:18
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Quote:
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On 2007-05-31 10:04, juice wrote:
SAGITTARIUS Drinking style In vino veritas -- and, for Sagittarius, in booze
blurtiness: When buttered, they'll spill all your secrets and many of their
own. Tactlessness aside, Sagittarius is just plain fun to drink with. This
is a sign of serious partying (what else would you expect from the sign of
Sinatra, Keith Richards, the Bush twins and Anna Nicole Smith?). They're the
people who chat up everyone in the room, then persuade the entire crowd to
travel somewhere else -- like a nightclub, or a playground, or Cancun .
Good-natured hijinks are sure to ensue (including a high possibility of
loopy groping; spontaneous Sag is a brilliant booty call).
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 omg haha thats mee!!! hehehe, i use to live in cancun by the way , and yeah i love to party and gest wasted haaaa i wish i could party with frank sinatra
If u are Something, Dont ask for nothing
If u are Nothing, Dont ask for something |
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Zman
IsraTrance Junior Member
Started Topics :
14
Posts :
3784
Posted : Jun 1, 2007 10:25
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Well i can tell you i had an aquarian drunkard bitch chutiya girlfriend as opposed to what this alcohoroscope says. hehehe ;-D |
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Anogenic
IsraTrance Junior Member
Started Topics :
23
Posts :
200
Posted : Jun 1, 2007 20:14
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Nothing true in the Gemini one for me...
«They who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night.» |
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juice
IsraTrance Full Member
Started Topics :
59
Posts :
2081
Posted : Jun 2, 2007 09:00
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i think v need to find out smokerhoroscopes...
Studies indicate that listening to music is good for digestion. |
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Anak
Anakoluth
Started Topics :
108
Posts :
2395
Posted : Jun 2, 2007 11:17
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Quote:
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On 2007-06-01 10:25, zmandan wrote:
Well i can tell you i had an aquarian drunkard bitch chutiya girlfriend as opposed to what this alcohoroscope says. hehehe ;-D
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yeah i am an aquarius and the above text does not apply to me at all.
i can drink like a horse. and i do it. and i like it.
but it's true that i can control myself very well when drunk, and that i'm even more charming then  . in fact, you wouldn't get the impression that i'm drunk until i'm lying under the doctor's exhausting my stomac.
Anakoluth A Pebble in Your Eardrum's Shoe since 2001!
http://www.myspace.com/anakoluth
http://www.ektoplazm.com/profiles/anakoluth/
http://cronomi.com |
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kArO
IsraTrance Junior Member
Started Topics :
11
Posts :
1206
Posted : Jun 8, 2007 22:24
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Quote:
| With the right Pisces, you can start out sharing a pitcher of margaritas and windup in bed together for days. The phrase "addictive personality" can be read two ways, you know |
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CRX(HSS Records)
IsraTrance Full Member
Started Topics :
97
Posts :
2707
Posted : Jun 9, 2007 03:01
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Quote:
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On 2007-06-08 22:24, kArO wrote:
Quote:
| With the right Pisces, you can start out sharing a pitcher of margaritas and windup in bed together for days. The phrase "addictive personality" can be read two ways, you know |
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Helicon Sounds Music
www.hssr.gr |
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pichchamp
Started Topics :
5
Posts :
68
Posted : Jun 10, 2007 15:20
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Quote:
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On 2007-05-31 10:04, juice wrote:
SCORPIO Drinking style Don't ever tell Scorpios they've had enough, for
they'll smirk at you and quietly but intentionally keep tippling till
they're hog-whimpering drunk, out of 100-proof spite. Scorpios like to
drink, and screw you if you have a problem with that. Most of them seethe
sauce as something to savor in itself, and not asa personality-altering tool
-- though if depressed, self-loathing Scorps seek total obliteration. But
generally, they're fascinating drinking pals, brilliant conversationalists
and dizzying flirts. They also remember everything -- especially what you
did when you were blitzed. Only drink with a Scorpio who likes you.
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ohhhhhhhhhh myyyyyy goddddd thats so true
THE MEANING OF LIFE IS TO GIVE LIFE A MEANING
--------------------------------------------
SeNkA TrIbE
FoLLoW ThE FooTsTeP
GeT rEaDy FoR a TrIbE gAtHeRiNg U wILL nEvEr FoRgEt |
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