Acid fart

On 2009-04-12 08:12, Elad wrote:
fart and try to listen carefully

i reken u meen good ol' saw with pitch band and cutoff sweep on lower octaves ?

On 2011-09-02 10:34, aje wrote:

Quote:

On 2011-08-30 22:04, A.Rosengren wrote: The topic subject made me think of a review written by aje on a symphonix album. I would love to read that one again, can't seem to find it A

Well, I couldn`t find it on isratrance either, because the search sucks, but I found it on psynews. Here it is, my old review on Symphonix - The Wild Life, quite literally the shittiest review I ever wrote ;

"Ever since one fateful 11-hour drive from VuuV to Ozora Festival in the summer of 2008, the music of the Symphonix will for me be forever linked to the noxious fumes emanating from one of my dear friends´ ass. I will call him J. for the purpose of this little review here, in order not to expose him and his gaseous ways on a public forum.

But let me elaborate. In the summer of 2008 about 20 friends and I went on a trip to VuuV festival and then continued on to Ozora festival in Hungary. J. was kind enough to give me a ride in his rather small car, along with his girl and another friend. After VuuV I had really bad cramps in my legs because I danced so much and didn't sleep for 3 days, so when I tried to stuff my 1,95 cm frame into his tiny car, the cramps got a lot worse. As luck would have it, J. had prescription muscle relaxers from an earlier back injury, and he gave one to me. After about 5 minutes in the car, I heard a dirty laugh coming from his direction followed by the smell of rotten eggs mixed with the unwashed vagina of a geriatric crackwhore about 30 seconds later. I loudly expressed my disgust and tried to find a comfortable position in the car so I could finally get some well deserved rest. Little did I know of the olfactory horrors that were awaiting me…

Now, I had taken muscle relaxers before at one point, but never after 3 days of partying with absolutely no sleep. As we got onto the highway, I slowly felt the muscle relaxers kicking in, and I fell into a weird half-sleep, where I was strangely conscious, yet I absolutely could not move one single muscle. I imagine it was like eating Fugu, an out-of-body experience but without the deadly outcome. As I submerged into that trance-like state, J. told his girlfriend "Put on Symphonix", and she did as she was told.

And that's when the Symphonix CD and the products of my friend's lower intestine melted into one strange synaestetic trip of hypnotic pumping beats and smells so hideous, even Tubgirl would have turned green in her face (actually, her face probably would have stayed brown…). Every 5 minutes or so, I heard a dirty little laugh, followed by a proud exclamation along the lines of "I don't know if you still classify that as biological warfare, considering all the chemicals I ate at VuuV it technically must be considered chemical warfare, höhöhöhö" or "That's why I could never be gay, whoever sticks his dick in my ass, it would immediately fall off, the environment is toxic down there, hahahahaha".

I was helpless, one minute I smelled the decomposing corpse of a 500-pound fat Samoan woman after it was lying at the bottom of a sewage treatment plant for a few weeks, the next I smelled one of Goa Gils dreads. And there was nothing I could do about it. I was paralyzed, only my nose was working better then ever. To add insult to injury, we made a stop where J. and his girlfriend went outside for a while. As he returned to the car he made sure to close all doors and windows, issued forth a thunderous fart and victoriously proclaimed "Ahhh, now I feel at home again!"

Anyways, later I found out that what we listened to was the first Symphonix CD "Music Prositute". And let me tell you, that prostitute specializes in anal. Strangely enough, the multisensory experience in the car made me really seek out the new Symphonix CD, "The Wild Life". Even though I was never a big fan of their music before (except their track "Druids" with that awesome haunting sample of a deranged woman screaming "Liar"), I discovered a certain hypnotic deepness in their music during that drive that I had never noticed before. Luckily, "The Wild Life" is better then everything they have done in the past.

Symphonix certainly did not re-invent the wheel on this record, but they dramatically improved on their trademark sound. The signature hypnotic synths that sound like they were recorded driving through a tunnel are still present, and so are the somewhat dry progressive grooves. But there is a lot more "flesh on the bones" because the tracks appear much more colorful and dynamic compared to their older stuff. And IMHO one sure hit is on this record, the perfectly titled "The Good Old Times". That little lead melody made me jump right out of my chair when I first heard it. Even though it is only a few seconds long, it perfectly captures the feeling of happy nostalgia that Symphonix probably tried to express given the tracks` name. Another stand-out is "Home Sweet Home", an exploration of how deep one can go using the means of prog. psy. Really hypnotic trippy shit, I`m sure it would inspire J. to dig very deep into his bowels to see what torturous smells he could unleash next into this world. And I also really enjoy "System Float", a very typical Symphonix track that I´m sure works wonders on the dancefloor, particularly after the break. The other tracks are all good to ok, but nothing that really stands out, except maybe "Resting Voltage", which kind of experiments with dark techy atmospheres.

Last but not least, I want to point out the cool cover of this album, especially considering the cheesy atrocity that was the cover of Music Prostitute. Nice color scheme, reminds me of Miami Vice. Perfect for abuse, hehehe… Anyways, a good solid album with 1 superb track (7), one great track (8) and one very good track (2).

Höhöhöhöhöhöhö…… "